Anxieties.

Britt is my best friend! I have many best friends but she is my bestestfriend. She has just finished school and I am now left there without her. I only started there last year and most of the reason why was because she was there. I miss her enough without taking her away anymore. But she is looking at moving away and by moving away I mean to a different island. This makes me so scared! I need Britt. She saved me from committing suicide. As well as Gemma did, and Gem is moving away too. I am so anxious and scared about the future. I just want to cry. I want her to make good decisions for her but I cant help but have selfish thoughts. I just wish she could find her happiness closer to home.

Another scary part of my future is losing many of my other friends. I am starting year 11 and so many people are moving away from school learning. I am so scared! I am a soccer player, a goalkeeper. The school wants me to play this season but I am also scared I will not be good enough! I am terrified! absolutely terrified!!

so much to take in one night! I am so torn up!

xo She, without a name.

The post..

My sisters 18th is coming up and Mitch is going. He posted on the event page confirming his attendance. My sister replied to this stating that he needed to come because I needed someone to chat me up. I feel so betrayed! ..and embarrassed! I am so sick of her "putting her 2c in" it is not need nor is it appropriate! I love how my patents think its hilarious because she is their "little princess". If I had done the same I would be in so much strife!

 Does anyone have any ideas to put her in her place?

xo She, without a name

replaced..

Today was an amazing day! Spent it with my cousin and aunty by the pool and at the beach. My cousin and I talk a lot about boys. She currently has a boyfriend so that's who she refers to. I know so much about this boy I have never met. What I wonder is.. who do I refer to? who should I refer to? I don't even know. Corey? Cameron? Mitch?

Today I also found out that my sister, Rachel, has stolen my spot on the state Futsal team. Futsal is my life. She told the coach as I was representing my country, I would be too busy to represent the state. yup, that's how she took my spot. I am beyond disappointed. Those girls are my life. I have Captained that team for so many tournaments and then.. nothing! I could literally cry! but its too late to regain my spot for this tournament.. and maybe they wont have me back.. and that just kills me.
You know the feeling of losing something you cant live without? that's the feeling I have every time I think of it. It doesn't help that the girls keep messaging me asking why I ditched them and that they just hoped I was going. That's what makes it 100 times worse.

xo She, who shall not be named

..and you are?

I have played sport for years. From swimming, athletics, soccer, futsal, volleyball, gymnastics, dancing and softball.. I have done just about everything. except Netball.. yuck! ..anyway, I meet heaps of people through my sport. A year ago my elder sister, Rachel, introduced me to an amazing guy, Mitch. He is really lovely and honest. Yesterday, he decided to facebook me. I forgot how much I really liked this guy. The problem, I  barely know him, he lives over an hour away and doesn't have a job. I am very picky with boys. I mean, im not anything special, but I have a busy life so if there is going to be an added distraction it better be perfect.
Things I look for:

• employed
• honest
• educated
• looking at getting a real career (not at Maccas for the rest of his life)
• Warm
• interesting
• one that has good values
• family orientated
• non-smoking
• non-drug taking
• someone that isn't too interested in drinking every day
• fun loving
• smiley

I know its a long list, but as I said.. I want someone that will fit into my lifestyle.

Mitch only ticks a few boxes but is just so fun. I just don't know? should I keep Mitch on the scene?

..xo She, without a name..

Introducing... Corey..

Today, Corey, one of my friends from school came to my side of town to 'chill'. I didn't want to lead him on as he is also a work colleague and I also have feelings for Cameron. We had an amazing day. Watching movies, mucking about in the surf and having flirtatious sand fights. all I could think was "I wish Cameron was like this with me. I wish he was open to having a fun time that didn't include being under the sheets." Not that I have been 'under the sheets' with him.
Why does it have to be so complicated. I am so torn. My overly protective father seemed to like Corey but he has never met Cameron. What's your thoughts?

xo She, without a name..

The beginning..

My story could nearly be a TV show. So many ups and downs I can barely get my head around. From boys to b*tches, my world has it all. Moving forward is how I cope in this madness but the stresses of society keep pulling me back.
There is a prince charming to this story. His name is Cameron. We are currently not 'together' as such. He makes me happy I just wish he saw the real me not just someone to 'satisfy his needs'.
The princesses? My bestfriend Britt, she is my saving grace. She has helped me though the roughest times this heart has ever had to endure. We are drifting slowly apart though. It crushes me to come to terms with losing her. Though, another Princess has begun to fill her void.
Teresa. She has been there for me also. She is becoming my new bestfriend. She is a little firecracker but is often hot and cold, and I never know what to expect.
I have been at my new school for 12 months now and I am beginning to really get to know everyone.
I went from a disobedient, rude, immature student to someone that is proud of her grades. I really care about my future now.

Im going to dive head first into my life and fill in the blanks on he way. enjoy.

..but who is, this princess..? refer to her as "She, without a name" xo